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October 25, 2006
i was tearing away. just like what i did last night. i think he felt helpless seeing me this way. he couldn't get the time he want to think about what he wants to do and he has to deal w me at the same time. i have become his burden. i am sorry baby. i didnt mean to make you unhappy. while i want you to be happy, i do not dare to let you go. i dont want to lose you. i dont know what to do. Posted by dew at
October 18, 2006
dont ask me to ask again cos it feels worse than not asking really it hurts to say it out why i am not happy about it or is it because i have been thinking about it for the past days and i am not able to handle the sudden outburst.. i dont know.. seriously..why isnt there anything that i know.. it feels horrible.. very.. dont ever put that idea in me again.. i know i cant do anything to change it.. i cant!!!!!!!!! you know how it feels when you know that you cant change something but to accept it u know u know???? how many times have such events that are beyond my reach appeared in this blog?!!! it always happens so many times that i just lost count of it it will always be like this because they are just so close i dont know why am i comparing with them why why why????????? somebody tell me!!! why do i feel less inferior than her i am so evil always thinking that others are bad who am i to judge the bloody hell of others i am just like that you know ..... i dont know why my tear gland seems a little unreactive today i want a satisfying crying session!!!!!!!!!!!!!! get over and done with this but it feels so stuck!!! i dont want this thing to stick in my heart anymore!!!!!!!! let it go please...... please i beg you.... please..... why cant i verbalise how i feel why do i always say 'nothing' and 'i dont know' I KNOW IT!!! why cant you just get it off your chest!!!! WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!! you are so sick i hate you ms chen such an ass just as inconsiderate to make him stay up because of this LOSER!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Posted by dew at |
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